Boring Vacation Narrative - Day Two, Part One

Our second day of vacation dawned early. Literally. You think a person who routinely wakes up at 4 a.m. to be at work at 5:30 sleeps in? Well, they do…I woke up between 5:30 and 6:00 needing to potty.

A glance into the living room told me that Pat was already up and about. Not a surprise, that – we were always up early drinking coffee on our previous trips to Florida. I found her in the family room, just watching it get light outside. I sat and visited with her for a bit, asked her if she’d been out on the lanai yet. She replied that she hadn’t. So, I started a pot of coffee, and headed to the shower while it brewed.

We sat out on the lanai with coffee in hand, talking about the trip, memories of Monie, my Mom, and her Mom. Unbelievable that we lost all three of them within five years. But yet, it wasn’t surprising. The Monaghan girls were the strength of the family, and after Mom died, the other two seemed to crumble before our eyes. It almost seemed as though they needed each other to survive, and they would find a way to be together no matter what.

Pat and I talked again about how it would be easy to learn to live in a place where the weather was warm and not have to fight winter weather any more. And we talked about how good it was that we could all make this trip together once more – Pat, Darald and I because it was for pleasure this time, no responsibilities to deal with; Barb and Robert because for Barb, she hadn’t gotten to see where Monie lived, and Robert because he felt left out and helpless throughout our previous trips as he was recovering from knee replacement surgery at that time.

Shortly after that, Robert joined us on the lanai, breakfast in hand. It got Pat and I up and about, fixing our own breakfast, ready to start the day.

Soon Barb joined us with her coffee. She asked how we’d slept. I told her I’d slept on the floor, and that I might pull the mattress off the bed and just put it on the floor for the remaining nights. If that didn’t work, Robert and I would be going to a motel for the duration because I didn’t think I could take sleeping on the floor for that many nights in a row. I wasn’t criticizing, but just being truthful. But, I also said that we’d just have to see what happened.

Barb relayed a story about her new nightwear. It seems on that trip to Wal-Mart the previous day, she decided that she would pick up some new jammies. This was a pair of boxers and shirt sort of set. She complained that all her nighties were dirty from the trip down. (I’m like…uh…you just left Saturday night…do you put on a clean nightgown EVERY night? Besides, there was a washer and dryer there for our use; why not just throw in a load of whites?)

Anyway, she went to put the new ensemble on at bedtime. The shirt was fine. She pulled the boxers up and they fell right back off. Seems that someone had put a medium top on the hanger (correctly marked) and put a 2X pair of boxers with it. No wonder they fell off! We heard about these pajamas for the next two days. We were all ready to shove the boxers down her throat to shut her up about them. I told her right up front to take the things back.

“But, I don’t have the receipt.”

“You’re going to exchange them. Just explain what happened. Wal-Mart has a policy that you can return so many dollars a year without receipts.”

Then she’d start all over.

“Do you know what happened? I bought these pajamas at Wal-Mart….” And we’d hear the story all over again.

“I didn’t have anything to wear to bed!”

“Why didn’t you just wear the shirt and a pair of panties?” She looked at us in horror at the thought. I couldn’t resist.

“Why didn’t you just sleep buck naked? After all, you and Darald have been married close to 45 years.” You’d have thought I had sprouted horns in front of her! She was horrified at the idea of sleeping nekkid with her husband. LOL

We sat around and talked, The four of us managed to get dressed, have breakfast and read the morning paper, and there was no sign of Darald.

Barb said, “He likes to sleep late in the mornings, sometimes he sleeps nearly till noon.”

WHAT??? We’re on vacation and they have the transportation. Barb finally woke him up about 10:15 after we told her that if she wanted to go to Naples, we’d best get on the road.

As it was, we didn’t get out of the house until 11:45. Naples was about 50 miles from our location in North Fort Myers. But, no big deal. Interstate 75 makes a fairly quick trip of it…or so we thought.

Darald was, of course, driving. Did he take the interstate? Noooooo….he took Hwy. 41 again. We went through ALL that traffic, all those lights once more. The reason? In the gospel according to Darald, I-75 was 6 lanes on both sides. He’d had enough of that driving on the way down. Besides, you can’t see any sights on the Interstate.

So, we pretty much drove him crazy unintentionally because we were pointing, laughing and saying things like, “Hey, look at that huge Barnes and Noble!” (you’ll never guess who said that, I’ll bet.) “Why look! There’s a restaurant named Mel’s Diner. Do you suppose they have someone named Alice there?”

Finally he turned up the radio really loud to try to drown us out. It didn’t work. We just got louder in our most obnoxious way. (What did he think? He had the *next* generation of Monaghan girls in his vehicle!)

We finally got to Naples a little after 1:00p.m. First thing on the agenda was lunch at a fabulous little bar called Alice Sweetwater’s. Alice’s was only a few blocks from Monie’s condo. She and John used to eat there a lot. In fact, it was the last place Monie went socially before her health failed. We took her there twice while we were there, and her ashes sat in the car while Darald, Pat and I ate there on our last night there two years ago. I always figured that that was why she soaked Darald and I when we scattered her ashes – she was pissed because she didn’t get to go in!

The bar is tiny, with lots of memorabilia on the walls. They do have a beer garden, but we ate inside. I ordered a grouper sandwich, Robert ordered fish and chips and the rest ordered tenderloins. Believe it or not, if you ever want a good tenderloin sandwich resembling those in the Midwest, you’ll get one at Alice’s. But, I order seafood as often as I can when I’m near a place where the fish is likely to be ‘really’ fresh! And, none of us were disappointed! Barb and Robert were both surprised. They thought Alice’s would be a larger place. Guess we made it sound larger than life, huh?

After we finished, Darald turned the keys over to me. “You’re far more familiar with Naples than I am.” So, I drove.

Our next stop was to Monie’s condo so Barb could see where she lived. Barb had this notion that she was going to march up to the door and ask the new owners if she could see the inside. While she was working herself up to do that, I took Robert to the back of the place to show him the lanai and the canal where we watched the ducklings play on previous trips.

No ducklings that day. As I turned around and looked up, I was horrified to see a “For Sale” sign on the lanai. Apparently the people who bought the place had only purchased it for an investment property to resell.

I know that’s common in Florida, but it still gave me a strange feeling. All this time I’ve had it in my head that some couple bought the place just like Monie and John did as they loved living in a golfing community and they’d be very happy there. Instead, it was just another investment property.

But, at least we don’t have that property hanging over our heads, terrifying us each hurricane season. It’s up to someone else to worry about it all now.

The temperature had climbed to the mid-nineties. Barb had opted to be ‘fashionable’ and had overdressed. She was rapidly coming down with heat exhaustion. She’d worn slacks, pantyhose and loafers, a sleeveless shirt (red, no less) with another shirt over the top of the sleeveless one. We tried to tell her to take off the one shirt, but she refused.

We got back into the air conditioning, and drove over to the clubhouse to see if the office still had a picture of John displayed from the days when he was president of the country club. The office was closed, so we never got a chance to see that. I headed for downtown Naples. Barb wanted to see an area called Tin City.

Tin City is a conglomeration of little shops, touristy junk or over-the-top high priced stuff. It’s fun, but it was not the area that Monie shopped, but for some reason, Barb had gotten it into her head that that was where Monie got all her stuff. Ah, well…it was fun to browse around there, for we’d never been there, either.

“Hats! We must buy hats!” Barb said. Everyone in Florida seems to be wearing some kind of hat, she said. In some ways this is true. Visors and sunglasses are important, especially to those of us who are from the Midwest and aren’t used to Florida sunshine.
So, we wandered into a little shop that had some hats. We all bought something. I bought a visor with a straw brim. I like it – I’ll get good use of it this summer.

By this time I’m beginning to get impatient. I can smell the Gulf, you see (or should that be sea?) In fact, Tin City is right on a backwater, and there are boats right there, bobbing up and down in little boat-dock garages. I want, even need to get my feet into the salt water. We headed back toward the van, passing a boat business that had large boats for sale. Barb got excited…she wanted her picture taken next to one of these boats. They were huge in her mind. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that these were rowboats next to to those she’d be seeing when we got over to Marco Island, for example.
Kate, keep yer mouth shut!

Back in the van, and I headed down Fifth Street toward the Gulf. A quick stop partway down showed me I was still several blocks from my destination – the area of the beach where the three cousin felons had scattered the ashes two years before. We only walked on the beach for a few minutes before Barb felt faint from the heat and we had to (regretfully) leave the beach. We drove up to the Naples Pier (click here to see the area promo of the pier), and parked. We walked out onto the pier. At that point I didn’t much care to wait for them, so Robert and I just took off for the end of the pier. I’ll have pictures and perhaps a brief video clip of it next time

For now, though, I’m going to close on this. It’s almost time for me to head for bed. Don’t want to be late on my first day at the new job! There’s more to tell, though. Look for Part Deux next time!