Thank you...

I want to thank those of you who've been kind enough to send me your hugs and prayers while I grieve for the loss of my dog, Dolly.

Coming only a year and a half after losing the "Dog Love" of my life, Libby, the loss of Dolly was far too soon, far too unexpected, and painful as hell.

I hadn't mentioned that she was sick on the blog, because, quite frankly, I didn't really know. Not exactly, anyway.

She was still enthusiastic about going for a walk, and chasing and barking at squirrels, eating her baby carrot treats and so on.

We noticed about ten days ago that she appeared to be losing weight. And, she was spending a lot of time at the water dish, and consequently, more time outside to pee. But, even so, nothing seemed really out of the ordinary.

But then she began drinking even more water, so much so that she'd fill up on so much water, she'd spit up the last little bit she drank. I called a friend whose dog had had diabetes. Every symptom that Dolly had matched what had gone on with the other dog.

So, I called the vet on Monday when I got home from work. Dolly was walking around with a bit of a hunched up back - so when I talked to the vet's office, I suggested that Dolly might have jumped off the deck and injured herself; that she might have diabetes; and that if it wasn't either of those things it was something far worse.

As we know now, it was far worse. A 12-in-1 blood test showed a BUN and creatinine level that was so off the charts there was not even a number. Dolly was in complete kidney and liver failure. The vet said that at the most, she'd have about five days left, and we'd probably come home and find her dead.

Her hunched up back made sense, then. My girl was in pain. And, no matter how much I didn't want to do it, I had to make that decision to let her go then, not somewhere in the next five days, possibly when I wouldn't be there to help her cross.

Yama is lost without her buddy. Even though...just even though there were a lot of differences between them.

I don't know what to do. On one hand, I don't necessarily want to get another dog right away. On the other, as lost as Yama is, I have to consider that she might need to have a friend to play with, too. I just know I was blessed to be able to bring that special girl home and love her for the last year and a half. I wish it could have been longer.

I do have to say thank you to one person in particular before I close this particular post. I have to thank Two Wolves for getting online yesterday when he saw me online. He literally stayed online with me all day, listening to me while I grieved, making sure that I was okay. He worked hard to make me begin to smile, since he knows me well enough after all these years to know that once I can smile and then laugh, the hurts begin to heal.

But, Wolfie, if you ever talk about being on a web cam again and picking your nose, I may have to drive down there and smack the shit outta you. You know how I am about snot! *gags*

But, then, you did succeed in making me laugh. Except for the content, I thank you for that. With much love, I thank you for taking the time to make me laugh when I needed it most.

And for those of you who've commented, I thank you, too. I could feel the love and the caring. And, that means so very much.