Lifestyle Changes

I've been quiet again of late, more so than I really want to be. But, I've been wrapping my brain around some necessary lifestyle changes, and for some reason, wrapping a brain is a painful process. *grin*

I haven't been feeling good for quite a while now. Vague symptoms; I've been trying to lose weight by way (weigh?) of Weight Watchers and while I initially lost 10 pounds it's all back plus about seven more.

I've been chalking it up to my best friend "Food", for Food doesn't disappear to watch all the sports channels, doesn't yell at me for my choice of political candidates, or tell me I don't shift gears right in my Jeep, among other things.

And, I figured that getting older might have had something to do with it, too. I don't recover like I did in my twenties. But, what was I recovering from? Gods know my social life ain't to blame. Between two jobs and trying to get a book done, it's not like I can hit the bars!

It remained a mystery until a few weeks ago when I received a letter from my blood bank after a donation. Seems my blood testing showed the possibility of auto-immune disease, and suggested I get things checked out.

The letter also said that the testing may have been a false positive because if I had any sort of infection at the time of donation, it could appear to be a problem.

I did have an infection and was put on antibiotics the same week as I donated. So, I ignored the letter, but just for the heck of it, I started investigating the symptoms of auto-immune diseases.

Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Check.
Lupus. Nope. No butterfly mask or other symptoms.
Fibromyalgia. Theoretically, yes, but I refuse to accept it as a disease in and of itself.
Thyroid issues. Could be. Was on Synthroid for a year, and took myself off the stuff when the medical establishment upped my dosage and it made me ill, and they told me I'd have to learn to live with it. Uh, no. That was worse than the thyroid problem.
MS. Check.

So, me being the worrywart I am, I started preparing myself to hear that I had MS.

I like to worry out all the possible scenarios in order to be as prepared as possible for whatever might happen. It keeps my hairdresser in business covering up the grey, you see.

TW convinced me I'd better go get things checked out just to rule things out; being a typical medical type, I tend to walk a wide berth around doctors...no offense to any of you docs, but I just see way too many of you as med students and residents to be reallllllly comfortable unless you've proven to me your head *really* isn't shoved clear up your ass...

Anyway, I decided to pay attention to what the good Wolf said. And, I was glad I had because, of all things, my feet started hurting.

Badly.

Some days I had to sit on the side of the bed for 20-30 minutes before I could put my weight on 'em. And, since I pretty much stand over at least half my shift, I wasn't amused by this in the least. My best description would be to say it felt like I imagined an Oriental woman with bound feet must have felt.

After an exam by my doc, she sat down with me and said, "I'll bet your thyroid has finally completely quit. Let's get another TSH, then a T4 and T3 if necessary, pending the TSH results."

Okay. Then she took a non-fasting cholesterol and had the nerve to yell at me when the numbers came back high. I'd just had a fasting one seven weeks previously and it was borderline.

When I told her about my feet, she asked me, "One foot, or both?"

When I said both, she asked if I had any other joint pain. Well, yeah. Both shoulders, elbows, knees, and my thoracic spine. Again, she asked if it was one or both joints. When I said both shoulders, elbows, etc., she said, "You don't have MS or fibro, you've got Rheumatoid Arthritis."

That had never occurred to me But, it made sense with symetrical joint pain.

Then she told me I had to start exercising six days a week and get the weight off. More labs were ordered and she said she'd call with the results.

Several days later, she called with the results.

Of course, now, in her mind, I've become yet another woman who's a hypochondriac because my TSH came back normal, my chemistries came back fine and my sed rate just a tiny bit elevated. So, my pain must be "all in my head."

I have been ordered to take the weight off in three months or I have to go on meds. (Watch me NOT fill the Lipitor script!)

So, I'm trying to stay busy away from the computer because it's very easy to eat a snack or five when I'm sitting here goofing around.

And, I'm damn happy that I don't have a Dx of Fibro, because then AD would undoubtedly tease the hell out of me about it. *chuckles*

But, what I really hate is this whole idea of my medical person looking at me like I'm nothing but frequent flyer, like I'm making up the pain in my feet, the fire in my back. Just because there's no lab *proof* of the pain doesn't mean it's not there.

I'm all for losing the weight, for I know it will definitely lessen the symptoms, perhaps almost entirely. So, I'll be out walking the one of the dogs every day, and trying hard to cut back on time with my friend, Food.

But, please believe me when I tell you it's a bad or painful day. I'm really not making it up - if it's so bad I'll *tell* you I hurt, it'll be a 15 on a scale of 1-10.